Voyager's Died
by Izzy
Summary: I wrote this during a fire drill the day after "Fair Haven" aired, to the tune of "American Pie"


#### Voyager's Died   
By Izzy   
To the tune of "American Pie" by Don McClane

A long, long time ago   
I can still remember   
How Voyager used to make me smile   
And when I pick up my pen   
I can make it live again   
And make some readers happy for awhile... 

But recent episodes make me shudder   
And we look from one another   
What have they done this time?   
Another horrid plotline! 

I was able to bear "Disease"   
And "Someone to Watch Over Me"   
But I can't bear what I now see   
To me, Voyager's died 

Oh, my, my you old Seven of Nine   
You never grow up, you take up all the screen time   
Beware Brannon Braga, your doom is nigh   
And to me Voyager's already died   
To me Voyager's already died... 

Did you watch Seska with wide eyes   
And did Tom behavior make you sigh?   
"Investiagtions" explained that...   
Did you believe that Kes survived   
When they forgot she ever was alive?   
And did you hope that she'd return   
In season five?   
Well we know Kim was in love with Seven   
Cause we saw them in "Revulsion"   
And then he got her smile   
We had hope for awhile   
We were cheerful bunch of Voyager fans   
With lots of P/T marriage plans   
But now we've all got wringing hands   
To me, Voyager's died 

And we're all singing   
My, my you old Seven of Nine   
You never grow up, you take up all the screen time   
Beware Brannon Braga, your doom is nigh   
And to me Voyager's already died   
To me Voyager's already died... 

Now for five years   
We watched and it rocked   
From "Caretaker" to "Equinox"   
We think how it used to be 

When "Blood Fever" showed on the air   
With an openess so very rare   
And it spurned off reactions beyound compare   
And as we crossed to season four   
We had to worry about the Borg   
And while Janeway and Chakotay   
Argued all the way,   
TPTB plotted behind the scenes   
To a put a new girl on out screens   
They tossed out Kes, and that was mean   
Perhaps Voyager'd died   
Cause some were singing   
My, my you old Seven of Nine   
You never grow up, you take up all the screen time   
Beware Brannon Braga, your doom is nigh   
And to me Voyager's already died   
To me Voyager's already died... 

Lots and lots of Seven of Nine   
The ratings are doing just fine   
But all the others are behind   
Since we need some new villians   
The writers create the Hirogen   
But I don't think that we'll ever   
See them again 

Then the J/Cers get all upset   
Cause of one alien babe they can't forget   
We all just turned white   
One fateful Wensday night 

Cause Kellin tried to take the field   
Thank God her's planets laws don't yield   
Our hatred for Braga was sealed   
We feared Voyager'd die 

We started singing   
My, my you old Seven of Nine   
You never grow up, you take up all the screen time   
Beware Brannon Braga, your doom is nigh   
And to me Voyager's already died   
To me Voyager's already died... 

Malon are all over the place   
25 thousands light-years of space   
Seperate our encounters with them 

Jason Alexander   
Makes some fuss   
Impressing very few of us   
I hope that we have seen the last of him 

And my shipper hopes start to fade   
My hands are clenched in fists of rage   
Tom and B'Elanna are together   
But we never see them so! 

And as K/7 fades from sight   
And J/C is a totured light   
I hear Braga laughing with delight   
I know Voyager's died 

And I start singing   
My, my you old Seven of Nine   
You never grow up, you take up all the screen time   
Beware Brannon Braga, your doom is nigh   
And to me Voyager's already died   
To me Voyager's already died... 

All my friends now sing the blues   
I ask them for good Voyager news   
Most just smile and turn away 

I hear Kes is coming back   
But as all of the writers hack   
I know like all the others   
She'll waste away 

Last night the J/Cers screamed   
P/Ters cried, K/7ers dreamed   
"Fair Haven" scare was spoken   
And our hearts all were broken 

And the Power That Be I admired the most   
Jeri Taylor of who we boast   
She took the last train to the coast   
To me, Voyager's died 

And she was singing   
My, my you old Seven of Nine   
You never grow up, you take up all the screen time   
Beware Brannon Braga, your doom is nigh   
And to me Voyager's already died   
To me Voyager's already died... 

We're all singing   
My, my you old Seven of Nine   
You never grow up, you take up all the screen time   
Beware Brannon Braga, your doom is nigh   
And to me Voyager's already died


End file.
